Parent Phone Calls: 101
When calling parents, there are a few key points that should help things run smoothly.
By this, I mean that you should ask for their support in some way. If you’re informing them of misbehavior, you could ask for their support in your consequences, etc. If you’re informing them of low grades or missing assignments, you could ask for their support in reminding the students to finish the tasks. See more details in the script below.
If you’re calling about low grades or missing assignments, have the grade book pulled up or your documentation - have your details ready. If you’re calling about misbehavior, have your documentation ready, so you can be specific.
You don’t have to write out a script, necessarily, but at least jot down some points that you need to make sure you cover. This will help keep the conversation on-track. Plus, if you’re nervous, having notes will help. I have a sample script in this blog post, so you can use that if you’d like!
It’s just polite to ask! Plus it lets them know that there is not an emergency at the school, and their child is safe. After you make your introduction, let the parent know that you’d like to speak with them about x, y, and z. Then ask if it’s a good time to speak with them, or if you could call back at a better time. Typically, the parents will have the conversation right then. See more details in the script.
Be positive that this issue will get resolved with the help from the parent. Be thankful of their time and their support in their child’s success. See more details in the script below.
Don’t forget to check custody arrangements
Know who you can speak with about your student!!
Don’t call if you’re frustrated, angry, or annoyed
Don’t put a crying student on the phone without warning the parent
Sometimes having the student inform their parent of their behavior is a good strategy, but this can be alarming to parents. Speak to the parent first, fill them in on the situation, and let them know their child is upset because they’re in trouble, but that they are ok (as in they are safe).
From Personal Experience: Fill the parent in on the situation before allowing the child to speak to them. I had a seventh grade girl who was nowhere near tears until she got on the phone - then the tears started to flow so hard she couldn’t even speak. Naturally, the mom began to panic. I had to grab the phone, fill her in, and let her know her child was ok…#lessonlearned
Don’t give specifics of OTHER students involved.
Remember that you need to be cautious about breaching confidentiality regarding other students involved - even if the parents are “friends”. Avoid giving out names and details of other students without that parent’s permission.
Don’t suggest medicine or going to the doctor
You are not a doctor, so you cannot recommend that a child be put on medicine or that he/she should be tested for medication.
Anytime medication is brought up, proceed with caution! If a parent asks your opinion, you can offer to track behaviors during the school day (ex: keep tallies and times the student is disruptive or off-task). You can also offer your observations of their child in comparison to the “typical” child in that age group, but be cautious here! For example, “I’ve seen several cases where students in 8th grade have had to make adjustments because the hormones can sometimes affect the result of the medication. However, I can’t say for sure if that’s the case with your child.”
Don’t engage in an argument
If a parent is getting angry and/or argumentative, try your best to diffuse the situation by NOT arguing back. If it’s something that MUST get resolved, offer to schedule a face-to-face meeting at a later date. Invite your admin to the meeting. The parent is less likely to engage in the argument if there are several people present, and hopefully they will have had time to cool off.
Don’t be nervous! You got this!!